by Ligia Houben | Jan 22, 2025 | Blog US
The night of January 14th, 2025 was truly something special. Surrounded by the warmth of familiar faces and the interest of new ones, I had the honor of presenting my new book, *Allow Me to Live My Grief… and Heal from the Inside Out*. The room was filled with compassion, love, and a shared desire to understand and transform grief. As I stood before the audience, I couldn’t help but feel a profound sense of gratitude for the opportunity to share my journey and, through it, offer hope to others.
This book is not just a collection of words—it’s a piece of my heart. Inspired by the loss of my beloved mother, “Allow Me to Live My Grief…and Heal from the Inside Out” is a guide for those navigating the complex emotions of loss. It is a call to honor our grief, to feel it fully, and to heal from within.
A Personal Journey That Resonates with Many
One story that deeply touched everyone in the room was shared by Chip Corlett. Chip spoke with such raw honesty about losing his beloved Katie. His words reminded us that even in the darkest moments, there is an opportunity to reconnect with love and purpose. It was a powerful moment of connection that left no one unmoved.
Why This Book Matters
“Allow Me to Live My Grief…and Heal from the inside Out” is more than a book; it’s an invitation. It invites you to embrace your pain, to validate your emotions, and to find your own path to healing. It’s not about forgetting those we’ve lost; it’s about discovering how to carry their love with us in a way that empowers us.
If you couldn’t attend the presentation, I want you to know that this book was written for you, too. Whether you are in the depths of grief or seeking to support someone who is, the words within these pages offer a compassionate guide. They remind us all that healing begins when we allow ourselves to feel.
You can watch here Book presentation video
A Moment of Gratitude
As the evening came to a close, I felt overwhelmed by the kindness and support of everyone who attended. The heartfelt conversations, the hugs, and the genuine connection were a beautiful reminder of why I do what I do. Your stories, your courage, and your willingness to embrace the journey of healing inspire me every day.
I’m also deeply grateful to those who have already purchased “Allow Me to Live My Grief…and Heal from the Inside Out.” Hearing how it has touched your lives affirms that this work is making a difference. If you haven’t had the chance to get your copy yet, I encourage you to take this step toward healing and transformation.
Join Me on This Journey
Grief is a deeply personal journey, but it’s not one we have to face alone. Through “Allow Me to Live My Grief…and Heal from the Inside Out,” I hope to walk alongside you, offering tools and insights to help you navigate your path. Together, we can honor our pain, celebrate our memories, and move toward a life filled with hope and purpose. Let this book be your companion as you move from suffering to honoring with love.
To everyone who joined me and to those who will pick up this book in the future, thank you for trusting me to be a part of your journey. May we continue to validate our grief, honor our loved ones, and heal… from the inside out.
From my heart to yours,
Ligia M. Houben
by Ligia Houben | Jan 22, 2025 | Blog US
On January 29, a tragic plane and helicopter collision near Washington, D.C. unfortunately claimed multiple lives, leaving an entire community in shock and grieving. My heart goes out to all the families who lost a loved one
in this tragedy. When such devastating events occur, grief is not just personal—it becomes collective, affecting those beyond the immediate families of the victims. The pain is felt by friends, first responders, and even strangers who are deeply moved by the tragedy. It touches our hearts to know something like this can happen.
We recently experienced another form of collective loss with the California wildfires, which destroyed homes and displaced families. My heart also accompanied all these families in their pain. Though different in nature, both tragedies bring profound grief—not only for the loss of lives but also for the loss of safety, security, and the world as we knew it. The sudden destruction of homes or the unexpected loss of life disrupts our sense of stability, leaving an emotional impact that lingers long after the event.
Understanding Collective Grief
Collective grief magnifies emotions like sadness, fear, and vulnerability, as the pain is mirrored throughout a community. However, these losses are often minimized or invalidated. Comments like “At least you weren’t directly affected” or “You can rebuild” can unintentionally dismiss the depth of grief people feel. When this happens, the mourning becomes disenfranchised, adding isolation to an already painful experience.
I personally understand the depth of such grief. In 1972, when I was 13 years old, an earthquake destroyed my hometown of Managua, Nicaragua, killing over 10,000 people. This was a year after losing my father, I lost my home and the business that had symbolized my family’s stability. These intangible losses—of home, safety, and familiarity—are just as profound as losing a loved one.
When a community faces a devastating tragedy, grief becomes more than an individual experience; it transforms into collective grief. This type of loss profoundly affects everyone who shares the emotional impact of the tragedy. The loss of the sense of security that binds a society leaves an emotional imprint that transcends the personal.
Collective grief amplifies emotions such as sadness, confusion, and vulnerability. This happens because the pain and uncertainty are not faced in isolation but are shared and mirrored by every member of the community.
The Importance of Recognizing Collective Grief
Acknowledging this type of grief is vital, not only for those who experience it directly but also for the collective healing process of the community. Accepting that losses go beyond the tangible allows us to show empathy and support. Validating the feelings of those who have lost their homes, their sense of security, or even the familiar surroundings they knew creates a space where healing is possible.
Moreover, it is essential to understand that healing does not occur in isolation. Connection, compassion, and mutual support are fundamental pillars for rebuilding not only homes but also a shared sense of hope and resilience.
How We Can Support and Heal Together
Validate Losses:
Acknowledge that every loss, whether tangible or intangible, is significant. Listen with empathy and avoid minimizing someone else’s pain.
Foster Community: Create spaces for people to share their stories and find comfort in connecting with others.
Provide Resources: Offer access to emotional support, therapy, and grief groups to help people navigate their losses.
In times of crisis, it is crucial to remember that we are not alone. Recognizing and honoring collective grief not only strengthens those who have suffered direct losses but also unites communities on the path toward rebuilding and hope.
Let us come together to validate these feelings and begin the journey of rebuilding not just our homes but also our shared sense of hope and resilience.
Ligia M. Houben
by Ligia Houben | Jan 6, 2025 | All, Blog US
The New Year is more than just a date on the calendar; it’s an opportunity for a fresh start. What does this new chapter mean to you? Beyond traditional resolutions, it’s important to connect with what truly matters: our authenticity, our capacity to heal, and our willingness to transform our lives.
1. What Does It Mean to Live Authentically?
Living authentically means accepting and embracing all that we are, including our emotions and experiences. Starting the year this way involves:
Recognizing difficult emotions that we often try to ignore, like sadness or grief.
Honoring our losses and lessons, allowing ourselves to heal from the heart.
Listening to our inner voice, letting it guide us toward what truly matters.
Authenticity isn’t about perfection; it’s about being honest with ourselves as we move forward with intention and purpose.
2. A New Year: A Door to New Opportunities
Each New Year is like a door that opens, offering us new possibilities. Even when we face challenges, we can always decide how we step through that door. Here are some steps to get started:
Reflect: Take time to write or meditate on the lessons of the past year.
Let Go of What No Longer Serves You: Say goodbye to what doesn’t add value to your life, whether it’s habits, beliefs, or relationships.
Visualize Your Intention: Imagine how you want to feel and what actions you can take to make that happen.
Crossing this door with purpose can transform how you experience the year ahead.
3. Keys to Starting the Year with Hope and Transformation
Honor Your Lessons: Every challenge from the past has taught you something valuable. Carry those lessons with you as tools for this new year.
Open Your Heart: Allow yourself to explore new opportunities, even if they push you out of your comfort zone.
Set Intentions, Not Resolutions: Instead of rigid lists, focus on how you want to feel and the steps that will bring you closer to that.
4. Your Guide to a Year of Hope and Purpose
The key to a transformative year is living authentically. By listening to your heart, embracing your emotions, and moving forward with intention, you can create a year full of meaning, even in the face of challenges.
Keep in mind that 2025 is an open door full of possibilities. The choice of how to step through it is in your hands. Honor your emotions, focus on what truly matters, and move forward with hope. This could be the year you reconnect with yourself and transform your life from the inside out.
May this year be one of authenticity, hope, and transformation.
Happy New Year!
Remember, your life has meaning!
Ligia M. Houben
by Ligia Houben | Dec 27, 2024 | Blog US
As we live the final days of 2024, let’s take a collective pause—a moment to reflect on what this year has brought into our lives. Welcome to Transforming Grief, a space of love and compassion where we gather with open minds and hearts. I’m Ligia Houben, and today, I invite you to explore the beauty and resilience that can emerge from even the most challenging times.
Embracing the Duality of the Season
The end of the year often brings a blend of emotions—joy and celebration for some, and heaviness for those navigating grief. For many, the holidays serve as a reminder of loss, amplifying feelings of loneliness or sadness. As we step into the final week of the year, I want to honor your journey, your grief, and the immense courage it takes to keep moving forward.
Grief reshapes us in profound ways.
I’ve felt this transformation in my own life, starting with the loss of my beloved father when I was 12. It led me to dedicate my life to supporting others in their journeys of loss and healing. Through grief, we often discover inner strength we didn’t know we possessed.
Reflecting on Your Accomplishments Amidst Grief
This past year has undoubtedly brought its challenges. Yet, amidst the heartache, there have been moments of resilience, courage, and growth. Take a moment to reflect:
What have you accomplished despite your grief?
What moments of strength are you most proud of?
Did you take even a single step toward healing?
Remember, healing doesn’t have to be grandiose. It can be as simple as allowing yourself to feel your emotions, reaching out for support, or practicing forgiveness. These small acts are monumental because they show your commitment to honoring your journey.
Recognizing Losses Beyond Loved Ones
While the loss of a loved one is often the most recognized form of grief, this year may have brought other types of loss—loss of health, stability, or a sense of security. It’s important to acknowledge and validate all these experiences. Grief is multifaceted, and each type of loss deserves compassion and understanding.
Preparing for the New Year: Letting Go and Transforming
As we prepare to welcome 2025, consider what you’re ready to release. Are you holding on to painful memories, resentment, or mistakes that weigh you down? Now is the time to transform these burdens into lessons and opportunities for growth. Ask yourself:
How do you want to enter the new year?
What are you ready to let go of?
How can you transform a painful memory into a loving one?
Imagine stepping into 2025 with an unburdened heart, ready to embrace hope, love, and peace. Even as we grieve, our loved ones remain with us in spirit, carried forever in our hearts. By opening our hearts, we honor their love and continue to carry it forward.
The Greatest Gift: Love
Love is the most profound gift we have. It’s the thread that connects us to others, to ourselves, and to those we’ve lost. As we step into the new year, remember to unwrap this gift. Let it guide you toward healing and transformation.
Closing 2024 with Intention
As this year comes to a close, take time to honor its sacred moments—the joys, the pain, and the love that endured through it all. Carry your loved one’s memory with you into the new year and step forward with intention and hope.
Thank you for allowing me to be part of your journey in 2024.
May 2025 bring you renewed hope, love, and healing.
From my heart to yours,
Ligia M. Houben
by Ligia Houben | Nov 28, 2024 | Blog US
Thanksgiving is a cherished time to reflect on our lives and connect with what truly matters: gratitude, love, and healing. It’s more than just a holiday; it’s an opportunity to pause and appreciate the blessings that surround us. This year, embrace Thanksgiving with an open heart, giving thanks for the strength that comes from love and the transformation that arises from healing. Let this season of gratitude inspire meaningful connections and reflections on what truly brings us joy.
The Power of Thanksgiving Gratitude
Gratitude is at the heart of Thanksgiving. It’s a moment to acknowledge not just what we have but also who we are and the journey that brought us here. Gratitude is transformative—it allows us to turn challenges into growth and loss into resilience. This Thanksgiving, reflect on:
Thanksgiving traditions that strengthen bonds.
Whether it’s gathering with loved ones, sharing a meal, or expressing thanks, these rituals remind us of the beauty of connection.
The strength you’ve gained through challenges. Difficult times often reveal how resilient we truly are, giving us the courage to keep moving forward.
The healing power of gratitude.
Even amidst loss or pain, giving thanks helps us find peace and meaning in our journey.
How to Celebrate Thanksgiving Meaningfully
To make this Thanksgiving truly memorable, focus on creating moments of gratitude and love. Here are some ideas to help you celebrate meaningfully:
Start your day with Thanksgiving reflections.
Begin the day by writing down what you’re grateful for or sharing your thoughts with someone close to you. This small act can set the tone for a day filled with appreciation.
Honor loved ones in your Thanksgiving traditions.
Take a moment to remember those who have touched your life, whether they’re present with you or in your heart. Share a story about them or light a candle in their honor.
Express gratitude as a family.
Around the table, invite everyone to share what they’re thankful for. This simple tradition can deepen connections and create lasting memories.
Practice Thanksgiving mindfulness.
Take time to appreciate the present moment—the warmth of loved ones, the delicious meal, and the joy of togetherness.
The Healing Power of Love and Gratitude
Love and gratitude are inseparable. When we give thanks, we honor the love we’ve received and shared. This Thanksgiving, recognize the transformative power of both:
Gratitude heals. It shifts our focus from what we’ve lost to what we’ve gained, helping us find meaning even in life’s challenges.
Love strengthens. It provides the foundation for resilience, guiding us through life’s ups and downs.
Thanksgiving isn’t just about the traditions or the meal—it’s about opening your heart to gratitude and love. When we embrace Thanksgiving with this mindset, we create space for healing, connection, and joy.
Thanksgiving as a Season of Transformation
This Thanksgiving, let the gratitude in your heart transform the way you see the world. Reflect on the blessings in your life, honor your journey, and celebrate the love that surrounds you. Remember, every expression of thanks brings healing and strength.
May this Thanksgiving be a time of renewal, connection, and heartfelt gratitude for all that life has to offer.
Warmly,
Ligia M. Houben
by Ligia Houben | Nov 14, 2024 | Blog US
“At times our own light goes out and is rekindled by a spark from another person.”
—Albert Schweitzer
Feeling appreciated, understood, and heard are essential human needs, especially when we are dealing with grief. During the holidays, these needs become even more crucial, as the season can be a trigger and often amplifies feelings of loss and longing. Meaningful grief support groups can provide the understanding and companionship that make a difference during these challenging times.
Having facilitated numerous support groups over the years, I’ve seen the incredible healing that occurs when people come together. One of the most rewarding experiences has been offering my 8-week program, Transforming Grief and Loss, which is rooted in my unique methodology, the 11 Principles of Transformation®. This program offers a space where people grieving can establish meaningful connections that last well beyond the structured group sessions. The bond created is powerful and nurturing, offering participants not just support but a true sense of belonging.
For several years, I co-led the two-day Congregational Health Bereavement Program training with Dr. Rev. Dale Young, Director of Pastoral Care, at Baptist Health South Florida. Although we no longer run these sessions (Dale retired), the program’s success still warms my heart. Through this initiative, we trained facilitators to host bereavement support groups in churches, helping countless people navigate their grief. These groups provided comfort and validation, reminding people that they were not alone in their journey.
More recently, I had the privilege of leading the seminar Navigating Grief During the Holidays at Stanfill Funeral Home. It was beautiful to see participants form an instant connection, a testament to the power of shared experiences. The holidays can be particularly painful when you’re grieving, but these seminars offer practical strategies, emotional support, and the comfort of being surrounded by others who truly understand.
One of the most impactful aspects of my workshops and seminars is the hybrid approach I use. Not only do I share actionable information about coping with grief, but I like to create an open space for participants to share their stories. This combination of learning and sharing is what makes these groups invaluable, as people feel safe, validated, and cared for, which is exactly what they need to begin their healing journey.
The holidays are a time when grief can feel overwhelming, but support groups remind us that we don’t have to face it alone. These groups offer a lifeline of hope, connection, and healing. As we gather and share, we rekindle our inner light through the support of those who truly understand our pain.
If you’re navigating grief, whether during the holidays or beyond, remember that healing is possible. Grief support groups can transform your experience of loss, helping you find strength, hope, and a renewed sense of purpose.
In the words of Albert Schweitzer, sometimes it’s the spark from another person that rekindles our own light—and that’s the true power of coming together in support.
From my heart to yours,
Ligia M. Houben
