by Ligia Houben | Dec 27, 2024 | Blog US
As we live the final days of 2024, let’s take a collective pause—a moment to reflect on what this year has brought into our lives. Welcome to Transforming Grief, a space of love and compassion where we gather with open minds and hearts. I’m Ligia Houben, and today, I invite you to explore the beauty and resilience that can emerge from even the most challenging times.
Embracing the Duality of the Season
The end of the year often brings a blend of emotions—joy and celebration for some, and heaviness for those navigating grief. For many, the holidays serve as a reminder of loss, amplifying feelings of loneliness or sadness. As we step into the final week of the year, I want to honor your journey, your grief, and the immense courage it takes to keep moving forward.
Grief reshapes us in profound ways.
I’ve felt this transformation in my own life, starting with the loss of my beloved father when I was 12. It led me to dedicate my life to supporting others in their journeys of loss and healing. Through grief, we often discover inner strength we didn’t know we possessed.
Reflecting on Your Accomplishments Amidst Grief
This past year has undoubtedly brought its challenges. Yet, amidst the heartache, there have been moments of resilience, courage, and growth. Take a moment to reflect:
What have you accomplished despite your grief?
What moments of strength are you most proud of?
Did you take even a single step toward healing?
Remember, healing doesn’t have to be grandiose. It can be as simple as allowing yourself to feel your emotions, reaching out for support, or practicing forgiveness. These small acts are monumental because they show your commitment to honoring your journey.
Recognizing Losses Beyond Loved Ones
While the loss of a loved one is often the most recognized form of grief, this year may have brought other types of loss—loss of health, stability, or a sense of security. It’s important to acknowledge and validate all these experiences. Grief is multifaceted, and each type of loss deserves compassion and understanding.
Preparing for the New Year: Letting Go and Transforming
As we prepare to welcome 2025, consider what you’re ready to release. Are you holding on to painful memories, resentment, or mistakes that weigh you down? Now is the time to transform these burdens into lessons and opportunities for growth. Ask yourself:
How do you want to enter the new year?
What are you ready to let go of?
How can you transform a painful memory into a loving one?
Imagine stepping into 2025 with an unburdened heart, ready to embrace hope, love, and peace. Even as we grieve, our loved ones remain with us in spirit, carried forever in our hearts. By opening our hearts, we honor their love and continue to carry it forward.
The Greatest Gift: Love
Love is the most profound gift we have. It’s the thread that connects us to others, to ourselves, and to those we’ve lost. As we step into the new year, remember to unwrap this gift. Let it guide you toward healing and transformation.
Closing 2024 with Intention
As this year comes to a close, take time to honor its sacred moments—the joys, the pain, and the love that endured through it all. Carry your loved one’s memory with you into the new year and step forward with intention and hope.
Thank you for allowing me to be part of your journey in 2024.
May 2025 bring you renewed hope, love, and healing.
From my heart to yours,
Ligia M. Houben
by Ligia Houben | Nov 28, 2024 | Blog US
Thanksgiving is a cherished time to reflect on our lives and connect with what truly matters: gratitude, love, and healing. It’s more than just a holiday; it’s an opportunity to pause and appreciate the blessings that surround us. This year, embrace Thanksgiving with an open heart, giving thanks for the strength that comes from love and the transformation that arises from healing. Let this season of gratitude inspire meaningful connections and reflections on what truly brings us joy.
The Power of Thanksgiving Gratitude
Gratitude is at the heart of Thanksgiving. It’s a moment to acknowledge not just what we have but also who we are and the journey that brought us here. Gratitude is transformative—it allows us to turn challenges into growth and loss into resilience. This Thanksgiving, reflect on:
Thanksgiving traditions that strengthen bonds.
Whether it’s gathering with loved ones, sharing a meal, or expressing thanks, these rituals remind us of the beauty of connection.
The strength you’ve gained through challenges. Difficult times often reveal how resilient we truly are, giving us the courage to keep moving forward.
The healing power of gratitude.
Even amidst loss or pain, giving thanks helps us find peace and meaning in our journey.
How to Celebrate Thanksgiving Meaningfully
To make this Thanksgiving truly memorable, focus on creating moments of gratitude and love. Here are some ideas to help you celebrate meaningfully:
Start your day with Thanksgiving reflections.
Begin the day by writing down what you’re grateful for or sharing your thoughts with someone close to you. This small act can set the tone for a day filled with appreciation.
Honor loved ones in your Thanksgiving traditions.
Take a moment to remember those who have touched your life, whether they’re present with you or in your heart. Share a story about them or light a candle in their honor.
Express gratitude as a family.
Around the table, invite everyone to share what they’re thankful for. This simple tradition can deepen connections and create lasting memories.
Practice Thanksgiving mindfulness.
Take time to appreciate the present moment—the warmth of loved ones, the delicious meal, and the joy of togetherness.
The Healing Power of Love and Gratitude
Love and gratitude are inseparable. When we give thanks, we honor the love we’ve received and shared. This Thanksgiving, recognize the transformative power of both:
Gratitude heals. It shifts our focus from what we’ve lost to what we’ve gained, helping us find meaning even in life’s challenges.
Love strengthens. It provides the foundation for resilience, guiding us through life’s ups and downs.
Thanksgiving isn’t just about the traditions or the meal—it’s about opening your heart to gratitude and love. When we embrace Thanksgiving with this mindset, we create space for healing, connection, and joy.
Thanksgiving as a Season of Transformation
This Thanksgiving, let the gratitude in your heart transform the way you see the world. Reflect on the blessings in your life, honor your journey, and celebrate the love that surrounds you. Remember, every expression of thanks brings healing and strength.
May this Thanksgiving be a time of renewal, connection, and heartfelt gratitude for all that life has to offer.
Warmly,
Ligia M. Houben
by Ligia Houben | Nov 14, 2024 | Blog US
“At times our own light goes out and is rekindled by a spark from another person.”
—Albert Schweitzer
Feeling appreciated, understood, and heard are essential human needs, especially when we are dealing with grief. During the holidays, these needs become even more crucial, as the season can be a trigger and often amplifies feelings of loss and longing. Meaningful grief support groups can provide the understanding and companionship that make a difference during these challenging times.
Having facilitated numerous support groups over the years, I’ve seen the incredible healing that occurs when people come together. One of the most rewarding experiences has been offering my 8-week program, Transforming Grief and Loss, which is rooted in my unique methodology, the 11 Principles of Transformation®. This program offers a space where people grieving can establish meaningful connections that last well beyond the structured group sessions. The bond created is powerful and nurturing, offering participants not just support but a true sense of belonging.
For several years, I co-led the two-day Congregational Health Bereavement Program training with Dr. Rev. Dale Young, Director of Pastoral Care, at Baptist Health South Florida. Although we no longer run these sessions (Dale retired), the program’s success still warms my heart. Through this initiative, we trained facilitators to host bereavement support groups in churches, helping countless people navigate their grief. These groups provided comfort and validation, reminding people that they were not alone in their journey.
More recently, I had the privilege of leading the seminar Navigating Grief During the Holidays at Stanfill Funeral Home. It was beautiful to see participants form an instant connection, a testament to the power of shared experiences. The holidays can be particularly painful when you’re grieving, but these seminars offer practical strategies, emotional support, and the comfort of being surrounded by others who truly understand.
One of the most impactful aspects of my workshops and seminars is the hybrid approach I use. Not only do I share actionable information about coping with grief, but I like to create an open space for participants to share their stories. This combination of learning and sharing is what makes these groups invaluable, as people feel safe, validated, and cared for, which is exactly what they need to begin their healing journey.
The holidays are a time when grief can feel overwhelming, but support groups remind us that we don’t have to face it alone. These groups offer a lifeline of hope, connection, and healing. As we gather and share, we rekindle our inner light through the support of those who truly understand our pain.
If you’re navigating grief, whether during the holidays or beyond, remember that healing is possible. Grief support groups can transform your experience of loss, helping you find strength, hope, and a renewed sense of purpose.
In the words of Albert Schweitzer, sometimes it’s the spark from another person that rekindles our own light—and that’s the true power of coming together in support.
From my heart to yours,
Ligia M. Houben
by Ligia Houben | Nov 9, 2024 | Blog US
When I first met Claudia C. Castillo, I was deeply moved by her story. Her journey is one of profound transformation, embodying the possibility of moving from a place of suffering to a place of honoring with love which is the message that lies at the heart of what I share with those who grieve. Although our pain is natural, rooted in the deep love and loss we feel, we can choose to transform that pain into a legacy that both honors our loved ones and invites healing.
On the evening of August 27, Claudia presented her book, Symphony of the Soul. 8 Tools for Finding Joy After Loss at Books and Books in Coral Gables, Florida. I love this bookstore as I have also presented my books there, and it brings memories that touch my heart. The space was packed with people who came not only to support her mission but also to seek solace in their hearts after suffering their own losses. Witnessing this gathering was a testament to the impact of Claudia’s work.
I had shared the event details with several of my clients, believing that her message and techniques could bring them healing, and it was beautiful to see the community come together in such a heartfelt way.
Symphony of the Soul. 8 Tools for Finding Joy After Loss is more than just a book; it’s a guide that stems from the heartbreak of losing her son Álvaro Luis to an overdose. Her techniques offer a comprehensive path to personal healing and spiritual awakening.
Through her meaningful book, Claudia delivers not only practical techniques but also powerful spiritual messages she received from Álvaro Luis. Her commitment to her son’s memory becomes a gift to all of us, transforming personal loss into a message of hope, empowerment, and healing.
One of the things that Claudia and I share with our hearts is that we both write as a way to honor our loved ones and heal. This makes me feel very close to her as I know that writing becomes a sacred space where we open our hearts, and our grief finds purpose and healing. I say this with my heart as my book, Allow Me to Live My Grief…and Heal from the Inside Out, which is launching on November 19, is my way of honoring my beloved mother. When we open our hearts we are able to transform our memories into messages of love.
I’m also thrilled to announce that on Tuesday, November 12th, we will be hosting a live session on Instagram at 8 PM. This will be an opportunity for us to connect and share stories. We invite you to join us for this heartfelt gathering, where we hope to inspire healing and honor the memories of our loved ones.
Symphony of the Soul. 8 Tools for Finding Joy After Loss, invites all of us to heal and transform our loss.
Claudia’s story reminds us that healing is possible and that in honoring our loved ones, we can create a legacy that uplifts the human spirit. Her journey teaches us that even through profound grief, we can choose love, embrace purpose, and find strength in the bonds we share.
From my heart to yours,
Ligia M. Houben
by Ligia Houben | Nov 1, 2024 | Blog US
Grief is a journey many of us avoid walking. Furthermore, when we lose someone dear to us, we find ourselves navigating this path with no map, only the raw reality of pain and longing. Writing Allow Me to Live My Grief…and Heal from the Inside Out was not just a creative endeavor but a calling—a need to reach out to others traversing this complex journey of grief and healing, and offer them the comfort, wisdom, and compassion I have gathered from my personal and professional experiences.
What Inspired Me to Write This Grief Healing Book
This book emerged from my own profound encounters with loss and grief, particularly the passing of my beloved mother. She lived a rich life, filling our days with joy, and when she left, she took a piece of me with her. As a grief counselor and thanatologist, I had helped countless people process their grief. But losing my mother was different; it left me with a void that required me to confront my own beliefs and practices in managing grief and finding healing.
Losing my father at the young age of twelve first introduced me to this painful journey of loss, but my mother’s passing reaffirmed something crucial: grief is a universal right we all have, and living through it fully is the path to eventual healing. Writing this book allowed me to honor her memory and share the lessons I learned as a grief professional, hoping they would resonate with those who find themselves in similar pain, seeking comfort and a way to heal.
My Intention: A Safe, Compassionate Space for Healing Through Grief
Through Allow Me to Live My Grief, I wanted to create a safe space where readers can confront their pain without judgment. Grief is unique to each person, yet society often pressures us to “move on” quickly. This book counters that message by encouraging you to sit with your grief, to let it wash over you, and, in doing so, to truly heal. By sharing both my personal grief journey and the stories of others I’ve had the honor of guiding, I hope to validate your grief and empower you to find a way forward at your own pace. The exercises, reflections, and questions throughout the book invite you to make this grief journey personal, transformative, and ultimately healing.
How Allow Me to Live My Grief Can Help You Find Inner Healing
In my experience as a grief counselor, the most profound healing happens from the inside out. This book is not about “getting over” loss; rather, it’s about finding a way to carry it, transform it, and honor it. Each chapter contains practical advice on coping with grief, heartfelt stories from dear clients, and insights drawn from both personal experience and professional expertise. You’ll find guidance on facing difficult emotions, embracing self-care practices, and exploring your own unique path to healing and recovery.
This book offers more than a narrative—it provides a roadmap for those willing to turn inward, face their pain, and ultimately heal. I invite you to join me on this journey, to allow yourself to grieve fully, and to open your heart to the possibility of renewal.
An Invitation to Begin Your Healing Journey Through Grief
If you are ready to take the first step, to allow yourself the space to grieve and heal, Allow Me to Live My Grief…and Heal from the Inside Out is here for you. It’s a compassionate companion for anyone seeking to navigate the complex emotions of loss with resilience, hope, and grace. Whether you’re in the early stages of grief or have been carrying it for years, this book will guide you toward inner peace, honoring both your loss and your path forward.
Always remember that…love is eternal.
From my heart to yours,
Ligia M. Houben
by Ligia Houben | Oct 29, 2024 | Blog US
Grief is one of life’s most profound and painful experiences. Yet, in a world that often values moving forward over feeling deeply, we’re sometimes discouraged from fully processing our grief. Ignoring grief, however, doesn’t lead to true healing. In fact, Allow Me to Live My Grief…and Heal from the Inside Out emphasizes that allowing yourself to experience grief fully is a vital part of the journey toward healing. This compassionate approach honors grief as a necessary process that helps us move forward in a healthy, meaningful way.
Why It’s Important to Feel Grief Fully
Many people wonder, “How can I cope with grief?” or “Why does grief take so long to heal?” The answer lies in recognizing that grief isn’t something to avoid or rush through. Ignoring or numbing grief often leads to unresolved pain, which can impact emotional and physical well-being. By allowing ourselves to feel grief fully, we allow ourselves to process our pain, ultimately creating space for a life of acceptance and inner peace.
Here’s why allowing yourself to feel grief is essential:
Releases Suppressed Emotions: When grief isn’t expressed, it builds up and may cause stress, anxiety, or even physical pain. Allowing yourself to feel enables you to release these emotions, which can reduce tension and help you find peace.
Builds Self-Compassion: Embracing grief is an act of kindness. It tells you, “It’s okay to feel this way.” When you accept grief as a part of the healing journey, you’re fostering self-compassion.
Strengthens Emotional Resilience: Experiencing grief helps build resilience, equipping you to handle future challenges with more strength and understanding.
Honors the Memory of Loved Ones: Fully experiencing grief allows you to keep the memory of loved ones alive, integrating their impact into your life story.
How to Cope with Grief: Steps for Healing
Knowing that “feeling grief is essential for healing” is one thing, but how can you practically allow yourself to grieve? Here are some strategies that can help you cope with grief in a healthy way:
1. Give Yourself Permission to Grieve
Many people feel that grieving takes too long or that they should “move on.” Remind yourself that it’s okay to feel grief and that there’s no fixed timeline. By telling yourself, “I’m allowed to feel this way,” you’re creating space for healing.
2. Create Safe Spaces for Reflection
Healing from grief often requires safe spaces where you can freely express emotions. Set aside time for self-reflection, journaling, or simply being in a quiet place. These moments allow you to connect with your emotions and feel your grief in a supportive way.
3. Practice Self-Compassion
When you feel guilt, regret, or anger in the grieving process, treat yourself kindly. Self-compassion is key to healing and helps you understand that grief is complex, with no “right way” to feel.
4. Seek Support and Connection
Grieving alone can make the process feel even harder. Find supportive people to share your experiences with, whether it’s friends, family, or a grief counselor. Support groups can also offer comfort by connecting you with others who are experiencing similar emotions.
5. Explore Personal Rituals to Honor Loved Ones
Many people find solace in creating rituals to remember and celebrate loved ones. These can be simple, like lighting a candle, or more elaborate, like an annual memorial. Rituals provide a sense of connection and comfort, allowing you to keep loved ones in your life even as you heal.
A Compassionate Guide to Healing Grief
Allow Me to Live My Grief…and Heal from the Inside Out was crafted as a compassionate companion for those seeking a way to heal that feels true to them. The book emphasizes that healing from grief doesn’t mean forgetting or “moving on” but rather integrating the experience into your life in a meaningful way. Through self-compassion, reflection, and healthy coping techniques, readers are encouraged to see grief not as an obstacle, but as a process of profound growth and resilience.
We Can Heal from Grief
In the end, the power of allowing yourself to feel grief lies in embracing each step with acceptance. Grief is not just about loss; it’s about honoring the life and love that existed. Allowing yourself to feel each emotion as it comes is a gift you give yourself—a gift that opens the door to healing and peace.
If you’re wondering how to cope with grief or feel overwhelmed by the journey, remember that each step you take brings you closer to healing. By giving yourself the space to feel, you’ll find the strength to heal from the inside out, embracing life with renewed compassion and understanding.
From my heart to yours,
Ligia M. Houben
