We often say we’re “burned out” when we feel we have too much work, too many demands, too little time.
But what if what we’re feeling isn’t just exhaustion… what if it’s grief?
Grief doesn’t always appear after the death of a loved one. Sometimes, it hides behind our endless to-do lists, our pressure to perform, and our exhaustion from trying to do it all.
The Loss We Don’t Recognize
When we live in constant stress, our nervous system stays on high alert. We keep pushing, doing, performing — until we collapse.
And underneath that collapse is often a loss we haven’t acknowledged:
The loss of freedom — the feeling of having space to breathe, think, or simply be.
The loss of balance — when every moment feels scheduled, controlled, and monitored.
The loss of connection — with others, with our bodies, and even with ourselves.
The loss of joy — when everything becomes a task instead of a choice.
Burnout as a Form of Grief
Burnout can be a symptom of ungrieved loss — the loss of the lifestyle we once had, the identity we built around “managing it all,” or the illusion that we could handle everything without breaking.
We grieve the time we no longer have.
We grieve the version of ourselves who felt in control.
We grieve the energy we used to depend on.
This is not weakness. It’s the body and soul saying, “I need a pause.”
From Burnout to Healing
Healing begins by validating the grief beneath the exhaustion.
When we name the loss, we create space for compassion — not more pressure.
Ask yourself:
What have I lost that I haven’t allowed myself to grieve?
What freedom, routine, or version of me am I missing most?
Acknowledgment is not indulgence it’s truth.
And truth is where healing begins.
If you want to learn more about how to deal with Burnout listen to my podcast Are You Burned Out or Just Grieving?
Remember, pay attention to yourself. Your life has meaning!
Ligia M. Houben
