I understand that facing the death of a loved one is not easy, because we miss that person every day. But remember that even if this person is not physically present, their memories will always live on. We can transform the relationship we had with that departed person, since the bonds of love will continue after they have passed from this life. Although these ties are invisible, they are as precious as gold. These bonds with our loved ones can inspire us to forge a life with a higher purpose and greater meaning. But to endure a loss of great magnitude we must be compassionate with ourselves and allow ourselves time to suffer and grieve. The tears and comforting conversations are necessary. There is no defined time for processing our grief. We each process grief at our own pace.
Ligia M. Houben
Transform Your Loss. Your Guide to Strength and Hope.
Don’t tell me to move one.
Don’t tell me she is in a better place.
Don’t tell me she lived a long life.
Don’t tell me she would like to see me happy.
Don’t tell me to be strong.
Don’t try to console me.
Let me be with my grief. It is a sacred place, as I am grieving so much, because I loved my mother so much.
Her love will remain in my heart next to my father. I know it will be a time when my suffering will be transformed into the most beautiful spiritual experience. I know this because that is what I want to happen.
However, right now, I want to be here. Still, in silence. One with my pain and my beloved mother’s memories. I want to be fully present to my pain because I know it will be the only way to release the suffering.
I said in my book, Transform Your Loss. Your Guide to Strength and Hope, that we learn to live with our loss.
It is not a matter to forget or move on…it is a matter of moving forward with my beloved mother’s love, her inspiration, her joy, and her faith, in my heart.
For now…let me be still.
Ligia M. Houben
